I’m not Blonde—Just Naive

Hi again.  So this week is my last week of “school” for the summer and I have two more stories to share with you from my Journalism Feature Writing class.  This one is a “funny story” that is really just a personal reflection and not journalistic style. It was just to get practice writing in a funny style and give me time to write my big final article that I’ll post next.
Anyway, it is a little risque but it is a true story and I hope you get a chuckle from it like my kids and boyfriend did.

P.S. Please don’t be offended if you’re blonde–no offense was intended.

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I’m not Blonde–Just Naive

By Marianne Frontino McCreight
Follow me @marmccr8 or mariannemccr8.wordpress.com

People say humility is good for you. I don’t find it too difficult. For every wonderful thing I do or impressive bit of knowledge I may have, there is something equally—well, not impressive that keeps me from getting a swollen head.

For instance, when I was 15, I got my parents custom matching t‑shirts for their anniversary. I had their names put on them and picked out great iron-on graphics that were especially suited for them. I was so proud of these thoughtful gifts I knew they’d love.

My parents had recently purchased a liquor store (party store) with their best friends and they were avid poker players, gathering with friends weekly to play poker. The t-shirt graphic showed a group of people playing poker with beer all around the room. Perfect!

I presented their gifts, anxiously awaiting their reaction when they read the sayings and realized how thoughtful I had been and how perfect they were.

I knew something wasn’t right when everyone there got very quiet. My mom barely looked at hers and dropped it in her lap. I was puzzled. My dad asked me what made me pick these out and I excitedly explained, “You all love playing poker and now you have a liquor store—I could just see you having poker games in the stockroom. Aren’t they great?”

Everyone in the room seemed to breathe a sigh of relief. I realized my mom didn’t wear many t-shirts so I could understand she wasn’t very thrilled about getting one and didn’t think any more about it. And honestly, my dad wore his t-shirt for years after that, usually around the house.

Many years later I understood that undercurrent running through the room when they opened their gifts. And I have to say, I think everyone who was there was a pro at containing their emotions.

You see, the graphic on the shirt had a saying that read, “Liquor up front—poker in the rear.”

What are some of your most embarrassing moments?

(Image courtesy of mintchipdesigns on Pixabay)

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